WEEK EIGHT
FRESNO ST
+17 @ Boise St- The players of the San Fernando Valley will be more than
impressed with the number of Taco Bells in the metro Boise area. And they’ll
actually have water to drink too!
BOWLING
GREEN -2 vs Western Michigan- There’s no chance that the Broncos will have the
opportunity to trash their locker room in Ohio this week. And why would the
idiots in Moscow, Idaho keep a microwave in the visitor’s space? Popcorn? Hot
Pockets? Geno’s Pizza Rolls?
NORTHERN
ILLINOIS -11½ vs Miami, Oh- The quality of football being played by the
Redskins rivals watching old people fucking. So you can go watch a Nicholas
Cage movie or this drivel…
MIDDLE
TENNESSEE +1 vs UAB?- These pretzels are making me thirsty… John has a brown
mustache. The chair is against the wall. Louisiana is the Pelican State…
OKLAHOMA ST
+9 @ TCU- Those poor horny toads, they just couldn’t keep it together… Like a
guy on a first date who leaves his wallet at home and gets his buddy to bring
it to him only to have his buddy bang his date then get her pregnant then they
fight in the locker room and then make up… Totally Awesome!
UTAH ST +5½
@ Colorado St- I know a guy in Ft Collins who grows marijuana for the state and
he has never heard of football nor has he ever seen an episode of Seinfeld. He
wears cargo pants and keeps parakeets in the pockets when he walks 3 miles to
get a mocha frappachino latte at the pretentious coffee shop…
NORTHWESTERN
+6½ vs Nebraska- What day is it? Isn’t it that time of the year when the
Cornphuckers seem to blow a sure win and their ruddy fanbase signs a petition
to ask Obama to stop sending all their corn to the Coca Cola Company???
ARMY -3½ @
Kent St- The Dark Knights are apparently wearing some recycled Iraq War cammo
uniforms this week, I don’t think the Golden Showers would be able to see them
anyways…
Selah...
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