WEEK EIGHT
CINCINNATI -12 vs UCan’t- I’ll be in Cincinnati in a few
weeks for a wedding… well, actually, I’ll be in Dayton… Now I’m really
depressed…
TOLEDO -14½ @ UMusn’t- The only reason Toledo exists is
because some assholes decided to dig a ditch so their shit would flow somewhere
else…
F$U -6½ @ The Institute- Since there’s nothing at all wrong
with Atlanta, I’ll let it rip on Tallahassee: There’s no more horrible kind of
trash than Panhandle Trash. And any police force that would arrest George
Clinton for smoking crack in the Shell parking lot deserves all the hate in the
world…
TEXAS A&M +6 @ Ole Piss- Oxnard is one of those towns
that actually has some kool people but they’re overshadowed by the sounds of
angry rednecks wanting ethnic cleansing and more Golden Corrals.
COLORADO +2½ @ Nice Beaver!- Corvallis is one of the most
intelligent cities in the country, and they show off this accomplishment by
hosting one of the yearly Kinetic Sculpture Races…
TEMPLE +3 @ East Cack-a-Lackie- Hurricane Floyd decimated
Greenville back in ’99, it wouldn’t have been so bad if everyone didn’t just
lay on their sofas watching “Freejack” instead of getting stuck in the rising
water…
OHIO U -3 @ Buffalo Chips- Ah, the age old argument as to
when & where some obese yankee dumped some fatty chicken pieces in hot oil
and covered them in butter and pepper sauce… Since then every jabronis in the
upstate area claims that their great uncle Vinnie was the originator of high
cholesterol…
CLEMSON -6 @ Moons Over my Hammy- I used to do some work
with the Port of Miami, and their director used to offer me FREE cruise
tickets. Needless to say, I still have my spleen & none of my children(that
I know of) have been thrown overboard due to my addiction to gambling on Jai
Alai or stone crabs…
Selah…
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