BC Gonzo Pix of the Week: Week 6

BC Gonzo Pix of the Week

Week 6 aka “Weak of Yellow Fever”

Finally, the GonzoFixer crew will make their first 2015 Celebrity Appearance in Tuscaloosa this weekend outside of the dank bowels of Brian-Dennehy Stadium. This is good for me, as all I’ve done this year is sit around the house and become a fucking hypochondriac. It’s been a dog-shit year, and I can’t wait until it’s over.  Anyway, for the sorority chicks trying to rush our broadcast booth this year, please brush your yuck-mouth teeth after consuming your BBQ pork nachos (you know who you are…) . I might even let you pinch me bum during the show…    

Fornit Some Fornus!

   Famed Dutch Character Actor or Modern Day Philosopher??

5 Star Platinum Pick:

Duke -13 @ Army: There was an era when our Kilbot Factory wasn’t getting whipped in every war or skirmish. That was also the last time their football team was worth a shit. Coach Buttcliffe and the Dookies storm the beaches of the Hudson River and obliterate the Cadets.    

5 Star Picks:

Minnesota -3 @ Purdue: Yes, Minnesota has a ton of players hurt, but if there is one thing Epileptic Coach Jerry Kill is good at, it’s a boring, time consuming ground attack. It’s kinda like the cautious gifts his wife buys him for his birthday – nothing to flashy! But seriously, he’ll have a fit if the Gophers don’t kick ass on Saturday. 

Akron -7.5 @ E. Michigan: Terry Bowden might finally be turning the corner in Akron and should have a layup against pitiful EMU. If our favorite corpulent coach keeps winning this year, the rumor is out that the Akron City Council will vote to change the city’s nickname from “The Rubber City” to “The Flubber City”.    

4 Star Picks:

Oregon -17 vs. Washington St: Speaking of alcoholic coaches, isn’t it time we put our kid, Mike Leach out to pasture.  When one’s career peaks as the 2-bit, sideshow radio host to Jack Arute, it be time when a Pirate Looks at Suicide.  Ugh, suicide jokes are always death…    

Michigan St -14.5 @ Rutgers: Rutger Hauer is my favorite character actor not named Brian Dennehy. He once said, “By not going to school I learned that the world is a beautiful place and needs to be discovered”.  I assume Scarlet Knight players have taken that to heart. Coach Dantonio might have a bad heart, but his Spartans thump the Fighting’ Hauers in the Sewer Bowl.

3 Star Picks (shits and giggles picks):

Navy +14 @ Notre Dame: When I was a young altar boy, I was told that Sea-Men and Catholics don’t mix. That’s until I met Father O’ Toole… Anyway, the Silly Sailors kick Touchdown Jesus in the nuts and keep it close in South Bend.  

W. Kentucky -8 vs. Middle Tennessee St: There is still a centuries-old border dispute between aptly named the Jackson Purchase that still festers today in the west-central region of these horrific states. Loser of this game has to keep it.  Andy McCollum must be rollin’ over in his grave… 

Ok For Now…..

BC Gonzo