2014 BC Gonzo Pix of the Week: Week 4

BC Gonzo Pix of the Week
Week 4 aka “Weak of Weak Kneed over Demon Deacons”

This week’s Turd Circus gives us winners in the form of a doomed Kilbot Factory, undocumented coaches, a Milquetoast Flora-Bama mullet toss, and a Tar Heel State pillow fight. Let's Get Down To Business....  


Can pupil pull off the upset over Lord Saban?

 5 Star Platinum Pick

Arizona -8 vs. California: They say the infamous Rich Rodriguez Sorta Rican offense usually hits full stride in its 3rd year, which is also when Rich gives in to his proclivity for big-bottomed secretaries who prefer cactus-shaped butt plugs over dark chocolate covered strawberries for National Administrative Professional Day gifts. Anyway, he’s gotten rid of those problems in the form of human-shaped carpet bombs at the Arizona/Mejico border. Look for Desert Smarmy to stomp the Liberal Bears.       

5 Star Picks

Wake Forest +2.5 vs. Army: The only thing more depressing than a home game in dreary Winston-Salem is the fact that the prevalence of meth use in the Armed Forces has now officially surpassed the percentage of those with PTSD. No wonder we’ve been whipped in every skirmish since 1950… This week, our esteemed ground forces would rather be facing the ISIS coed flag-fencing team than the Demon Deacons, who will win by double digits in the Skoal Bowl.

Missouri -13.5 vs. Indiana: This matchup hearkens my childhood memory of, after a long-ago Hoosier romp, Bobby Knight referring to former Mizzou Coach Norm Sloan as a, “rudderless thug who couldn’t lead a whore to bed…” Too bad that IU basketball and Coach Knight are both dead… and there’s nothing to look forward to in the future. Twinkle Toed Tiggers in a rout… 

4 Star Picks

Florida +14.5 @ Alabama: The Will Muscato experiment will likely self-destruct by mid-October in a fiery crash reminiscent of the ValuJet (aka, Lawn Dart Airlines) disaster in the Everglades (is an 18 year old reference still funny?). However, he did learn a few things from Saban – including the infamous Angry Dragon. Gaturds keep it close in overweight Brian Dennehy Stadium and possibly pull off the upset.

N. Carolina +3 @ E. Carolina: I will go back to my “system” – back when I was a young undergrad - honing my prognosticating skill set and doing bad things to pictures of my roommate’s sister… Anyway – that system banks on the Let Down factor. The cheating Tar Holes steal a SU win against the Butt Pirates. Chris Johnson must be rollin’ over in his grave…

OK For Now….
BC Gonzo