The Fixer's Week Four Road Trip

WEEK FOUR Memories from The Fixer's Road Adventures...

WASHINGTON +4 vs California- I’ve broken into both of these school’s stadiums, including using my wife as a lookout when I ran onto the field in Berkeley. I posed for a selfie with the ’90 Husky national championship trophy inside their booster club level in Seattle.

WESTERN KENTUCKY -20½ vs Miami, Oh- I was so bombed out on low-grade acid when I was 20, I thought I was in Bowling Green, Indiana instead of Kentucky, then saw a bunch of lizards driving around in Corvettes & realized I was a carrot.

Buffalo/ Nevada OVER 56- Reno brags about being a cool town, but there’s nothing kool about a bunch of gambling degenerates prowling around the seedy casinos and offering tourists hand jobs for $17.50.

ARIZONA ST +5½ vs Southern Cal- The tunnels of the Fiesta Bowl smell like a combination of Astroglide & hot dog water…

ARIZONA +3 vs UCLA- This Summer I finagled my way into the Mildcat’s stadium, and was temporarily trapped on the Club Level(see background photo on this blog). While I was there, I did a walking tour of famous houses of my #3 favorite movie of all time: Revenge of the Nerds…Get high on stress…

OLD DOMINION +8 vs Appalachian St- A young Fixer ventured to Boone and saw Widespread Panic serve it well chilled, and while I was there I played 5-on-5 in Kidd-Brewer. ODUhas Ballard Field, not an impressive venue, but just down the street in Portsmouth, my grandfather is enshrined in the Virginia Sports Hall of Fame…

SYRACUSE +24½ vs LSU- I have to admit, I’ve never been inside the Carrier Dome, nor have I ever wanted to. And I got hit in the head with a battery & had golf balls thrown at us in Death Valley, but that’s what those people do when they couldn’t beat their rival at home for 30 years…

Houston/ Texas St OVER 72- The fake grass in the Cougars’ new digs looks like it was recycled from my grandparents’ screened-in-porch from 1979. At least there’s no 80yr old men standing by the door ready to whip my ass with a belt when I spilt my grandmother’s scotch…

Selah...